What makes a good boyfriend, and ultimately, the perfect life partner?
While Mr. Right is definitely different for each of us, at his core, every man should have a certain set of qualities that make him relationship material.
They donât say that love is blind for no reason, so itâs best to always be prepared.
……..To avoid any possible future heartbreaks, take a look at the following list of 15 desirable qualities to look for in a guy.
If you find a man who checks all of the boxes below, you must remember this: he is a keeper!
Letâs begin!
15 Things To Look for in a Guy:
1. Knowledge, strength, and integrity, aka KSI
Knowledge, strength, and integrity are essential qualities to look for in a guy. They should be at the top of your list, especially if youâre trying to find a life partner.
Why does knowledge matter?
From having things to talk about to navigating less common life situations, being knowledgeable is important. Iâm sure youâve heard the saying âknowledge is power.â
Why does strength matter?
Both physical and mental strength ensure the success of any challenge that might arise in his own life and yours.Â
Why does integrity matter?
An honest man that adheres to moral and ethical principles is highly desirable because heâs unlikely to break them and cause you or others pain.Â
For example, cheating would be out of the question with such a man. So, keep this abbreviation in mind: KSI.
If thinking about the rapper, boxer, and YouTuber KSI helps you remember, then go ahead! Truth be told, heâs got quite an impressive KSI score himself.
Finding such a guy is not going to be easy, but when you do, donât forget to praise him for it. You could say something like âYour KSI is impressive!â
However, to avoid confusion, you should mention youâre not referring to the rapper!
2. He is Confidence in himself and his abilities
Before we talk about a manâs confidence, letâs get one thing straight: being confident is not the same as being arrogant.
Many women confuse these two traits. However, itâs important to realize that a confident man will not hesitate when faced with numerous life situations, including making you happy.
You need a guy who doesn’t get jealous easily and heâll always be prepared to handle whatever comes his way because he knows he can do it.
He wonât feel threatened by other men and he wonât let others belittle him. He knows his worth and relies on himself and his abilities in both his personal and professional life.
According to study material done for a popular source of psychological information, if a man is confident it means he has recognized the best in himself and heâs embraces it.
You see, being confident doesnât mean that you donât have any flaws. It means youâre well aware of those flaws, but you donât let them bring you down or control any aspect of your life.
A confident guy is a must for a great relationship and you can easily identify a confident guy by observing their body language.
3. He is A loving and sSupportive
I am sure you are aware of how important it is to have someone to support you. Whether itâs your dreams or your career, having a supportive man by your side is a must.
And, because supporting someone also means being gentle, encouraging, and caring, another quality to look for in a guy is a loving nature.
In fact, being supportive is considered one of the purest forms of love, according to a research psychologist.
Even so, men and women express their support in different ways.
Different how?
Well, expect to receive practical advice to jump-start your career or reach your goals from him rather than encouragement only.
Either way, this is a desirable quality in a guy because it means heâll stand by your side and do his best to help you one way or the other.
4. He is Polite and kind
When it comes to finding the best possible boyfriend or life partner, another very important aspect of his personality comes to the foreground.
I am talking about kindness. And not only about kindness directed to you, but about kindness directed to everyone.
Hereâs one quick way to check: Go out with a guy of your choice and watch how he behaves with you and how he behaves with the waiter or waitress.
If he treats you with kindness, but heâs rude to them, then he might not be the guy youâre looking for. The same goes for being polite.
What does it really mean to be polite?
- A polite person is aware of the feelings of other people, and, at the same time, they respect them.
- A polite person usually has good manners.
- A polite person behaves respectfully and is not rude.
5. He is a Active listener
A man who really listens? Isnât that image taken from some sort of fairytale?
Contrary to what you might think, there are men capable of listening to what you have to say without being distracted or seeming uninterested.
Most of them manage to do it out of interest, but many of them also learn how to do it because they want to be good partners.
These men are constantly improving themselves, a fact that makes them even more desirable.
A guy with active listening capabilities is ideal because heâŚ
- ⌠remembers what you say to him;
- ⌠is engaged in conversations;
- ⌠asks you follow-up questions;
- ⌠tries to put himself in your shoes to understand you better;
- ⌠doesnât nod out of politeness while thinking about something else.
6. He is Romantic
Letâs face it: A lot of men these days have forgotten how to be romantic. They think the âdinner and a movieâ combo is the most romantic date ever.
They no longer do grand gestures, donât sing serenades, and donât buy flowers unless thereâs some sort of special occasion.
This is why guys with an inclination for romance have become highly sought-after. They are the ones who have found a balance between their manly attributes and their vulnerable ones.
On top of that, if you see this quality in a guy, you can rule out the possibility of him wanting to use you for intimate activities only.
A romantic guy usually believes in the concept of one true love and even soulmates, and he wouldnât keep any woman close just for sex.
Instead, hereâs what he would do, though:
- Plan romantic dates for you two;
- Try to surprise you with gestures and gifts;
- Be chivalrous with you;
- Show you his vulnerable side;
- Treat you with respect.
7. Honesty, openness, and transparency aka HOT
How else should a guy be? HOT, of course!
While physical attraction is also an important quality in a man, it didnât make it to this list. Yes, you got it right, HOT does not refer to a handsome man with a lot of sex appeal.
It refers to 3 more important qualities to look for in a guy, namely honesty, openness, and transparency. All these have notable roles in the success of a romantic relationship.
Honesty and openness might not be new terms for you. However, are you sure you know what transparency is all about?
Easily confused with honesty, transparency is about something else. Itâs not about withholding or not the truth, but about willingly sharing things that concern you or your ideas and feelings.
Whatâs more, it has numerous benefits, such as building a long term relationship based on respect, creating a deep connection between the two of you, and being vulnerable.
8. He is Emotionally Intelligence
What is emotional intelligence really about?
To thoroughly understand why emotional maturity intelligence is one of the qualities to look for in a guy, you have to first get a grasp of what itâs really about.
To put it simply, emotionally mature people arenât afraid to communicate with the help of their feelings, and, at the same time, they are open to the feelings of others.
They are able to perceive another personâs feelings, as well as understand them. They are also able to manage and handle these emotions.
Even if women are known to have higher emotional intelligence than men, studies show that men are also good at taking their partnerâs feelings into consideration.
They may not be as flexible as women are when it comes to accepting influence, however, they know this much: making compromises leads to a win-win situation.
So, if you find this in a guy, hold on to him!
9. He Believes in Gender Equality
Letâs get another thing straight: The term feminism refers to the equality between men and women. It doesnât express hate towards men or dominance over them.
On top of that, studies have shown that romantic relationships and marriages between feminist people have a higher chance of success and happiness.
This happens because the pressure of doing whatâs expected of them goes away. Men are no longer expected to be the providers. Women no longer expect them to initiate sex.
Also, in the case of women, they donât have to get married and have kids unless they want to. They can focus on their careers and build empires. There are no limits to it.
In other words, a feminist guy would make a great boyfriend and/or husband because he would treat you as his equal. He would not assume things about you just because youâre a woman.
10. He has a good sense of humor
Why is humor important in a guy?
Here are 3 main reasons:
- The ability to be humorous reveals intelligence;
- A funny guy is almost always also a creative guy;
- Humor makes him instantly more attractive,
- Relationship makes relationship so much fun and easy.
As you already know, men and women also work differently when it comes to humor. To be more precise, a woman is more attracted to guys who make them laugh.
Men, on the other hand, arenât especially attracted to funny women. Instead, they like women who laugh at their jokes.
You can look at it as a win-win situation: You find him hilarious, and in turn, he finds you more attractive. Thatâs why this dynamic always works!
11. He is Independent and Responsible
It goes without saying that being independent and responsible are also very desirable traits in a guy. An independent and responsible man is unlikely to fail his girlfriend or wife.
Let me give you some examples:
- A guy who still lives with his parents because itâs comfortable is not boyfriend material or husband material.
- A guy who doesnât take his responsibilities seriously is not desirable either. Such a guy is prone to failing in every area of his life.
With this in mind, Iâm not saying that there arenât exceptions or good reasons for a man to be like that.
However, these qualities matter a lot in romantic relationships. If you really want to make a rational choice, pick a guy who proves to be in control of his life.
12. He Has Similar interests and Hobbies
Isnât the having-things-in-common part overrated?
Although we might be inclined to believe the opposite, studies in this field have proven otherwise.
When two people that form a couple donât have things in common, they will automatically spend less time together.
In addition to that, if they donât share common interests, they will have less to talk about when they do spend time together.
As if that wasnât enough, psychologists point out another issue: The tendency to try to change one another greatly increases.
In other words, letâs say you love hiking and youâre always ready for an outdoor adventure. However, the guy youâre dating has a sedentary lifestyle.
At first, you might think thatâs no issue because youâll take him hiking with you and youâll show him what you like about it, hoping heâll like it too.
But you know what? He might hate it and also hide that from you because he doesnât want to upset you or do something to change your opinion about him.
Thatâs why looking for similar interests and hobbies in a guy is also essential. You can avoid numerous relationship problems if you like to do the same things.
13. He Believes In Self-reflection
Here goes another important quality to look for in a guy: self-reflection.
Self-reflection is about analyzing oneself and discovering strengths and weaknesses. Itâs also about giving serious thought to oneâs actions.
A guy with the ability to reflect on himself and his own actions has more chances to realize when he makes a mistake or when he does something thatâs out of his character.
However, a narcissist doesnât have this ability. Such a man doesnât admit when he makes mistakes. He has a high sense of his own importance and doesnât really care about what other people feel.
But, how can you discover this quality in a man early on?
Pay attention to what he tells you about various issues at work or with friends. If he always blames other people and doesnât take responsibility for anything, youâve got your answer.
However, if he considers the possibility of him being wrong and accepts he couldâve done better, heâs a keeper!
14. He is Respectful
I mentioned earlier that you can judge a guyâs character just by analyzing his behavior with a waitress or waiter.
You can also judge a guyâs character by analyzing his behavior with your family and friends. A desirable guy knows that your friends and family are important to you and, even if he doesnât like them, he still treats them with respect.
So, beware: If a guy treats you in the best way possible, but is inconsiderate with your friends and family, thatâs a red flag!
He might have hidden motives for being with you and treating you this way. He might want to get something from you and thatâs why he doesnât show interest in becoming an important part of your life.
15. He is Selfless and Charitable Nature
What other positive traits to look for in a guy? Selflessness and charitable nature, among others.
A selfless guy would make a great life partner because it means he wonât put his needs and wants first all the time.
Picture this: you want to go see a romantic movie, but he wants to see an action movie. For some reason, you can only pick one movie. What do you do?
If youâre a selfless person, you go with his choice because his happiness is more important to you than seeing a certain movie.
However, if youâre a selfish person, you insist on seeing a romantic movie no matter how he feels.
This is a silly example meant to make a point: You want a guy who cares about how you feel and who doesnât always think about himself.
Takeaway:
If youâre on a romantic journey and want to find the perfect boyfriend or life partner, you now know which qualities to look out for. But, before you do that, ask yourself if you also have some of these qualities or not. To be an ideal girlfriend or wife to someone, you also need to check at least some of the boxes above.
Only when both of the people involved in a relationship will inhibit this quality, it will be a successful relationship. Also, remember, to set realistic expectations. Don’t look for something that you yourself can’t give back in relationship.